Reid Kerr's Fistful of Sports

The Falcon In Winter

Falcons cornerback DeAngelo Hall said he and other Falcons plan to visit dogfighting quarterback and felon Michael Vick in prison in January. Say what you want about Atlanta, but at least when you play for the Falcons you know your teammates will visit you in jail.

And that you will always have your January free for travel and vacation.

Labels: Falcons, NFL, Vick

ESPN - Source: NFL tells ref actions against Barnett 'over the line' - NFL

Green Bay linebacker Nick Barnett will file a grievance against NFL official Jim Quirk for wrestling him to the ground during a skirmish in the Bears game last Sunday.

Good idea. While you're at it, why don't you sue NFL Films for the footage of the takedown, so you're not immortalized to future generation as "the linebacker who got taken down by a grandpa?"

Or worse, the first victim on "Don Zimmer's Smackdown."

Labels: NFL, Packers

Pirate Booty

The Oakland Raiders are writing off this season, just like last season, and the season before that, and the season before that, etcetera. THey've announced that their top pick JaMarcus Russell will start at quarterback this week against San Diego.

Man, nothing says "must see TV" like Oakland starting a rookie with a 24 QB rating against a playoff team that hates them.

Say what you want about the Oakland Raiders, but they do lead the league in quarterbacks who can throw a three interception game at a moment's notice. At least when Josh McCown is in there, they can run more than four different plays. With Culpepper back there, figuring out their offensive gameplan was about as complicated as Tecmo Bowl.

Labels: NFL, Raiders

The Lesser Simpson: Addendum

Just to complete my thought earlier about not know why Jessica Simpson was famous, the numbers are bearing me out, here. Her new movie opened at eight Texas locations on Friday, and pulled in a whopping $48 bucks a theatre.

Forty-eight dollars. In her home state. With Luke Wilson as the male lead.

Start the countdown to the Playboy shoot.

The Lesser Simpson

After she showed up at the game Sunday and watched her boyfriend lose, Jessica Simpson is now persona non grata with the Dallas Cowboys.

After quarterback Tony Romo stunk up the joint with Jessica watching, receiver Terrell Owens jokingly said this week that "Right now, Jessica Simpson is not a fan favorite — in this locker room or in Texas Stadium."

Well said, TO. However, I have one quibble. It's a given that Simpson isn't a fan favorite in Texas Stadium, but where exactly is she a fan favorite?

She's famous, sure. Can anybody tell me why? She sings, but not in an outstanding way. She pretty, but she's probably not in the top 10% of NFL player's girlfriends, or even of women in some sections of Dallas. She's sort of an actor, if you count that last movie she did that went straight to DVD, VHS, and Beta.

It's not like Romo is dating Angelina Jolie, or Madonna in the late 80's. Jessica is more of a latter-day Susanna Hoffs.

Giants Bubble Bursts

The practice bubble for the New York Giants collapsed on Sunday when a strong wind blew it down.

Wow. Most sports metaphors aren't that obvious. What next, the Atlanta Falcons busdriver forgets the directions to the stadium?

Labels: Falcons, Giants, NFL

Cowher to Falcons: "How Did You Get This Number?"

Former Steelers coach Bill Cowher told the Atlanta Falcons that he wasn't interested in being their next head coach, and was going to stay as an analyst. Nice call, Bill. Stay away from accepting jobs that have no future. In the same day, he also turned down the chance to star in the next "Jackass" movie, serve as Gary Busey's AA sponsor, and be John McCain's running mate.

I'm telling you, the Falcons are cursed. They might as well take the Falcon off of their helmet and replace it with an albatross, because that franchise is doomed to wander the league forever. They've never had back-to-back winning seasons, the most popular player they've ever had is now in federal prison, and their coach fled under cover of darkness to live in Arkansas.

There is never a silver lining, just another impending storm.

Labels: Falcons, NFL, Steelers

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